The Female Juxtaposition

When I was about 13 years old someone said to me, “you’re cute but you won’t be the beautiful one, that is your sister.” It obviously had an impact as I remember it vividly 43 years later.

Women are almost always first judged by their appearance and criticized for their assertiveness, feminism, control, facial expressions etc. etc.

As I watched the vice-presidential debate and listened to the commentating it saddened me to hear the comments, and knowing this was a no win situation for a black woman in the year 2020.

Memes plastered the internet of all of her facial expressions, some alluding that this is a typical unstable or bitchy woman.

Our previous first lady and current are criticized for their clothing, hair, makeup!

I love coordinated jewelry and clothes, bright lips and funky hair. Sometimes I feel like I am doing a disservice to myself for enjoying those things. Am I supporting a culture that sees this as my worth?

I am no slouch!! Highly educated, articulate and empathic. I serve a community that often has no voice. Is it wrong for me to also want to wear bright red lipstick?

I really don’t know where I am going with this. I just feel this struggle personally and see it in others.

Alicia Keyes made the bold decision to no longer wear makeup as a message to young women that they do not have to conform, and that beauty is more than skin deep. I respect that decision.

I also ask, has any man ever had to back off the beard balm or hair gel in an effort to be respected? I think not!

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