I try to stay positive, optimistic and think about ways that I can help instead of hinder. My job can be daunting and the world does not want to see or hear about the underbelly I call work. Returning to hearing the stories again forces me to shift my mind into a place where I compartmentalize, do what I can, and leave the rest alone. It can be especially difficult when you see that disbelief and fear in parents eyes, when they realize what has happened. Some people truly never know of the darkness that is out there. I want to share a couple of things to help keep you and your children safer.
Do not take your children with you when you socialize with other adults. Adult socialization, especially if it includes alcohol, should not include children. I know this sounds harsh. As a grandma of two little guys I truly know the need for an adult conversation and a glass of wine. I also understand that finding someone you can trust to stay with your child is difficult if not impossible. What harm can come from hanging out with a few other couples and their children? This is often the scenario that presents itself to me, in the course of an investigation. I won’t go into detail but we are not as capable of protecting our children when we are altered. We also do not know the history of these other families and children. It is not worth the risk. Let grandma watch them and go have your glass of wine. If you are worried about hurting the hosts feelings, make something up.
Do not force your child to hug or show affection to someone they don’t want to. Our personal boundaries are sacred and are there for a reason. Do not teach your child to disregard them. It also gives the message what the child feels is wrong. Let’s face it some people are creepy and we wouldn’t hug them. Don’t make your child.
Listen to you inner voice. If something doesn’t feel right it probably isn’t. Simple. You don’t need to explain it and please don’t rationalize it away. If by chance you were wrong, no harm no foul.
The positive. Most people are good. Most strangers are safe. People are survivors and resilient. The world is not a horrible place and a little perseverance goes a long way.
The picture shows the purity and perfection of nature. I try to see that in us as well.
Unapologetically Pretty 